3 shares for WE3

# 1 - Improved Quality of life

- I desperately wanted to improve communication with my parents because everytime i felt like i needed to pretend to be busy to get off the phone with my mother because i wanted to run away from her 'nagging'. Then afterwards I resented myself because I prided myself in having the 'best' relationship one could have with their mother. This was clearly inauthentic. I saw that i have not contributed enough to my family as I have been running away from my responsibilities. as a result I created the possibility to go back to Australia to be with my parents for two weeks prior to starting my new job to restore our relationship.

So basically when I was in Sydney I kept my schedule completely blank, and i told her that i'm not going to use whatsapp, fb, gmail but rather, just be with her. we don't have to speak to each other, we can just sit here and be, together. the first week was difficult as i still perceived her as nagging so we bickered. but one day as mother and i strolled down to the beach, i said, look, the way i have been communicating so far has not worked, and from hereon instead of listening from the space that you are nagging me, i will listen from the space that you care for me so much and you love me so much, so please nag away!!! she stopped walking and paused, a bit stunned, saying, oh, that's something different, i've been waiting for you to say that all this time, you know. I said yes i'm sorry but indeed it's better late than never!

Now, me and my parents are at the best we have ever been! she can freely tell me what she feels and i no longer run away. nowadays when i call her just to say i miss her, she'd still get very nervous thinking there's an emergency going on here which is probably one of the rare occasions i would call her in the past. Let's just say my breakthrough out of the AC is continuously evolving, the peeling of the onion doesn't stop! And the quality of live for the three of us has improved infinitely!

#2 Blind spot - didn't know that I was not related to people

I have gained so much over last few weeks and really realise what has shifted in my being. It's amazing cos one of the 6 friends of mine who did LMF last wkend, registered her best friend and bf into it last night, so i could really see that she's clearly benefiting from it. My other friend Y who also did it last wkend confessed to me that she could see the change in me in that, although I have known her for 3 years, previously I occurred to her as not very genuine - everytime I saw her, I'd hug her and be very warm in greeting without much substance to follow up. This is probably most people's experience with me in the past!!!! >,< (hopefully not anymore haha)

This was very eye-opening for me because I thought I was being friendly and these people never make effort to hang out with me!! I really see that this 100%/0% really works. Because previously I was measuring it with my own standard of 50/50% effort in hanging out with people. Yet, everyone's standard and judgment of 50/50 is different! But after the forum, she could see that I was really becoming genuine and really care for people, in my generous sharings (although to me, i was just doing a conversation, but probably because she can see the shift in my being which is much more authentic than previous 'garbage in, garbage out' approach in being with people.

#3 Being unstoppable where I otherwise would've been stopped in the past

So a few weeks ago Ross made me aware of the bare foot charity walk to raise funds for poor students in Guizhou so they can continue their secondary school education. This experience proved a huge breakthrough on several fronts because instead of my being in the past where I just donate a few hundred dollars and make myself feel good, I decided to really make a stand and do something completely different.

1) stepped outside of my comfort zone and did a 4km barefoot walk, which would've been unimaginable 6 months ago

2) I took a stand to rally a group of people together and pledged to reach a target of HK$5000 (subsequently raised to HK$9000)

3) Being unstopped in the face of lack of response

So I had about 2 weeks to raise the funds. On day 3 I had about HK$2000, and sent out email to about 150 friends and colleagues rallying them to either participate in the walk or sponsor us. Much to my disappointment I only got less than 5 responses by the end of the day. Whereas I usually would be very resentful for the lack of response, this time I caught myself and really got present to what it is I am committed. Am I still committed to raising the funds? Yes! Am I still committed to helping these students? You bet! So I decided there is absolutely no reason to take things personally, people may just be busy/scared of barefoot/forgot to reply, I'll just keep on doing what I'm doing. As a result I followed up with personalised emails and phone calls. Soon enough the money started rolling in. The outcome was fantastic, we had a group of 10 people, two dogs, and also managed to raise more than HK$14000, smashing my revised target of HK$9000. It was a very empowering experience because I learned to pick myself up again and move forward where I would've been stopped previously. As long as I remain committed in my cause and have faith in myself, being unstoppable in the face of no is a new possibility!