Last couple of days have been a bit stressful at best, yet full of pleasant surprises.
R called last night to share w me her breakthrough w the guy she's been seeing. While she previously thought of him as a writeoff because he was non committal due to his circumstances to relocate, he actually had second thoughts and wanted to get back together and start something with her, or at least try it out. This is after she had an authentic and touching conversation with her, which definitely caused the shift in him to open up as well. When I spoke to her, I was so happy for her! I was so happy for myself as well, that my friends are able to take my contribution and create something wonderful out of it!
Now, for myself, I am still trying to come to terms w my feelings for A. I have realised increasingly over the last couple of days that it's definitely not him, but what I take my interaction with me to mean. I have CL to thank for this, cos she kept on saying she feels sorry for his height and think I definitely deserve someone better. Nonetheless, I took it personally that he sent me that email on Mon to 'stop email flirting with him'. I was first of all, not aware of the impact of my emails.
I have already established that I resent looking weak, be it myself or other people. Heck, I couldn't even stand people using poor grammar or being less than eloquent, although for these sometimes it very much depends on my mood. Therefore, when I look bad cos someone put me down or I'm in a 'inferior position', or perceive myself to be, I resent the person who put me there and resent myself too. With everything else I am okay, but just him, appears to be my zenmaster and as a result I want to snap at him everytime he says something that 'annoys' me.
Parents and LMF
So I tried to register parents into LMF on Wed night. I was initially so super excited until mum made it very clear that what they want is to chill and relax.
They are the final frontier to me being committed but not attached.
R called last night to share w me her breakthrough w the guy she's been seeing. While she previously thought of him as a writeoff because he was non committal due to his circumstances to relocate, he actually had second thoughts and wanted to get back together and start something with her, or at least try it out. This is after she had an authentic and touching conversation with her, which definitely caused the shift in him to open up as well. When I spoke to her, I was so happy for her! I was so happy for myself as well, that my friends are able to take my contribution and create something wonderful out of it!
Now, for myself, I am still trying to come to terms w my feelings for A. I have realised increasingly over the last couple of days that it's definitely not him, but what I take my interaction with me to mean. I have CL to thank for this, cos she kept on saying she feels sorry for his height and think I definitely deserve someone better. Nonetheless, I took it personally that he sent me that email on Mon to 'stop email flirting with him'. I was first of all, not aware of the impact of my emails.
I have already established that I resent looking weak, be it myself or other people. Heck, I couldn't even stand people using poor grammar or being less than eloquent, although for these sometimes it very much depends on my mood. Therefore, when I look bad cos someone put me down or I'm in a 'inferior position', or perceive myself to be, I resent the person who put me there and resent myself too. With everything else I am okay, but just him, appears to be my zenmaster and as a result I want to snap at him everytime he says something that 'annoys' me.
Parents and LMF
So I tried to register parents into LMF on Wed night. I was initially so super excited until mum made it very clear that what they want is to chill and relax.
They are the final frontier to me being committed but not attached.
沒有留言:
張貼留言